Captain Spaulding's Murder Ride

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages, you are about to enter the world of darkness, a world where life and death are meaningless  and pain is God

We gonna have a good time now. On your right, you will see the infamous     Albert... Fish. Masochist, sadist, child killer and most importantly, cannibal

Mr. Fish, born and enjoyed spankings with nail-studded paddles, stuffing         needles deep into his groin.

Now, one of our most famous crazies, the psycho of Plainsfield, Mr. Ed Gein.    Murderer, cannibal, Mr. Gein used to take great pleasure of playing with    dead bodies of women, especially, their sexual organs.

Now, one of our local heroes, S. Quentin Quale, aka Dr. Satan. Murderer,     torturer, but most of all, master surgeon.      Mr. Quale was an intern at Willows County Mental Hospital, nicknamed     Weeping Willows for the neverending cries of pain. Through primitive brain          surgery. Mr. Quale believed that he could create a race of superhumans from the mentally ill. Vigilante justice prevailed.

They took his ass out and hung him. And that infamous hanging tree is no more than a stone's throwaway from where y'alls' ass is now seated.

But the next day his body was found to be missing. Until today no trace of    Dr. Satan has ever been discovered. But then, who knows? Maybe he lives next door to you.

 House of 1000 Corpses (2003) by Rob Zombie